What do I do?

Today is August 8, 2019 I am in the middle of battle against myself. A part of me knows that I need to find a way to earn to help my husband with our finances and I definitely agree with it. Searching online for jobs that I can do while I am at home and taking care of our kids is one of my major goal. My application with online teaching was a success, literally because I got hired after the tedious process. Upon being hired, I was excited to work for it but along the way, I realized that it will not work for me.

What is meant by booking system when it comes to online teaching was something that was not clear with me or let’s say it did not sync with me at all8. Not realizing the fact that I would have to commit to whatever time I will get a booking is something not applicable. As a full time mother, as someone who does not have anyone to rely on when it comes to emergencies as well as when it comes to ensuring everything that comes up at home is taken care of at a snap of a finger, I can never commit myself into being tied up to a booked class. What if I have a booking at 8 o’clock in the morning while both of my kids are in school but all of a sudden I need to run an errand for them in school. Can you imagine what would happened to my cancelled booking? What if this keeps on happening?

In light of my looking for an online way to earn extra, a friend suggested transcription works. And there I was about 30 minutes ago doing my online research of what its all about. Read on Google, watch on Youtube, check feedback, read on reviews, everything you can think about. I even got on trying the initial exam on one of the websites I can apply to. However, I feel like I got overwhelmed with all the things I need to familiarize, study, read and understand. The basic guideline on how to do transcription, does not seem to be something easy for me to do, since I have almost zero knowledge about transcribing as a job.

In a way, listening to anybody talking on my headset is something not hard for me because of my work background for the longest time. Similarly, speaking in English to teach the language to someone should not be hard for me because talking in English is part of my work background for the longest time as well. What would talking in English with someone that is non-native English speaker like me or listening to someone talking in English on my headset be any harder for me? Those are very basic for me and something I am not doing for the first time being in the call center industry before.

However, what I do not understand is my own feelings. I never want to submit to a booking system because I will not be happy having my hands tied-up. on a class. I never want to devote my time doing something and paying me on a per minute or a on per word basis. This is a weird and funny feeling I cannot explain. Despite of all that I am experiencing in our financial difficulty.

My heart is into something that I can do on my free time, and when I say free time, it must be really really really free. Like I can drop anything at any moment I need. My heart is saying that I should continue and push my blogging and vlogging. This is really what my heart wants at this very moment. This is what I want to pray to God.

I am extremely aware that if I go ahead and focus on my Youtube channel, the revenue will never come easy. I cannot give myself anytime frame until I am able to meet Youtube’s requirement and get my videos to show ads. More so, I am very much aware that I need to focus hard on my written blog if I really want to earn again on my advertising assignments from Payu2blog. This does not mean that I will be getting more money soon enough if I continue with my written blog.

With this decision making, I hope and I mean it really well that God may guide me and help me with my decisions. I hope I will be enlightened with whatever my decision would be. I hope it will be a permanent and happy one.

With all this, God I take everything into your hands. Your guidance will help me decide.

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